Tonight I visited a place where friends have been telling me to go for years. And it was just as magical as I always knew it would be. Although I am still building my collective, it felt like I found a place where I am surrounded by the people I love most in the world. […]
Read more "Welcome Home: We Are All in This Together."
How can I say this? I think it is intensely invaluable for people (human beings) to learn their own style of loving, how they love and how they want to be loved. I think this is important because this forms an extremely useful template for so much insight for everything else that a person does […]
Read more "Learn How you Love: Catching the Big Fish."
Hidden places are of course internal and external and both literal and figurative. So the literal hidden place is both Toni Patisserie and the Cultural Center. These were the places where I met and fell in love with an artist, with my city of origin, and most crucially with myself again. And the figurative hidden […]
Read more "Hidden Places: Final Reflections"
Yesterday was a really extraordinary day. It started out good and just got better and better. It was also my father’s birthday! My father has kind of been a spirit guide for me in my life. Ever since I was a child, we would have long conversations about living out a life of meaning. I […]
Read more "And Suddenly Everything Starts Falling into Place."
I think this part of the city is called Noble Square, but perhaps I just projected that fiction because it seemed too delightful not to be so. It is that little area on Milwaukee southeast from Wicker Park (the main hipster stretch) and before it hits River West and the west loop. I love the […]
Read more "Weekday Afternoon in a Chicago Bakery and Swing Dancing on a Hill by the River"
I recently decided to make a list of all of the people in my life who I know truly care about and desire for my happiness. I was amazed by how long the list became, and by the people who I thought to put on it. There are about six people on the list who […]
Read more "The Alterity of the Self-Aware Lover Emerges: Part 2"
There is something strangely cathartic about seeing your own smirking face in a headshot while it lights up in flames. I have been modeling professionally for 7 years cumulatively. I started when I was 18 as a means of self-exploration because I felt like my outward appearance did not match how I felt myself to […]
Read more "Letting go: How I became a retired model."
Falling in love can be the best and worst experience simultaneously. I said it when I looked at his sketchbooks, that I felt like I was going to burst (it was so overwhelming), vomit, cry, and laugh forever…all at the same time. It was a terrifying and wonderful experience. It’s like when you really lose […]
Read more "“You haven’t really met yourself yet.”"
This post is about all of the people in my life who have shown myself to myself through a bricolage of synaptic membranes connecting synchronous being-in-the-world discoveries, pains, and fascinations through increasingly complex loops. In my rather short life thus far, I have been profoundly fortunate to have found mirror-souls. I have experienced moments with others […]
Read more "The Alterity of the Self-Aware Lover Emerges: Part 1"